How to Find Your People in a Big, Loud World
“A guide for cultivating community offline with intention and heart.“
There’s something sacred about walking into a room and feeling it—these are my people.
But let’s be honest. Getting to that moment can be messy, vulnerable, and much quieter than we expect. In a world full of noise, notifications, and algorithm-fed connections, finding real community feels almost like a forgotten ritual.
Still, I believe it’s possible. You can find your people. In real time. With real energy. And it starts with something simple.
Your presence.
1. Start with what you’re craving, not what’s trending
Forget the guides that tell you how to network or how to brand yourself into friendships. Ask yourself one real question instead. What kind of connection am I truly craving? Is it long talks over tea? Is it laughter that fills the room and settles into your chest? Is it side-by-side stillness with someone who doesn’t need words to feel close? Community begins with that kind of honesty. With knowing what your spirit needs and having the courage to name it.
2. Create what you can’t find
Sundry Social was born from a personal ache. I didn’t want a party. I wanted softness. I didn’t need a scene. I needed soul. If you can’t find the kind of space you’re looking for, build it yourself. It doesn’t have to be big or polished or public.Set the mood. Brew the tea. Light the candles. Invite people into something gentle. The first step is offering up the kind of space you wish existed.
3. Lean into the awkward
Real connection rarely arrives in perfect packaging. Sometimes it shows up through nervous laughter or long pauses or conversations that don’t quite land. And that’s okay. Not every moment will click. Not every room will feel like home. But when you keep showing up, and you keep being seen, something beautiful happens. The people meant for you begin to find you back.
4. Choose depth over quantity
You don’t need a full room. You just need a few people who feel like safety and joy. The world celebrates volume. But community is about resonance. Choose the ones who see you clearly and stay anyway. The ones who ask how you’re really doing. The ones who feel like warm light on a quiet afternoon.
5. Put your phone down and your soul out
We capture so much that we forget to experience. But the best parts of community live in the pauses. The eye contact. The unscripted laughter. When you let yourself be present, people can feel you. Not just watch you. And something changes. Something opens.
The Invitation
This world may be loud, but there are still soft corners. Still quiet rooms full of warmth. Still people like you looking for connection. Sometimes all it takes is one yes. To show up. To be seen. To make space for someone else.
Your people are out there.
And maybe, just maybe, they’re already hoping to find someone like you too.